Fathers and male caregivers play an important role in the lives of children with disabilities or special health care needs. This article shares resources, services and support options to help male caregivers connect with others, understand services, support their child’s development and care for their own mental health and well-being.

This article was created in collaboration with the Washington State Fathers Network.

Fathers and male caregivers play an important role in the lives of children with disabilities or special health care needs. Their involvement can support a child’s health, development, communication, emotional regulation and overall well-being.

Children with special health care needs may have physical, developmental, intellectual or behavioral needs that require extra support. As more children are identified as needing this kind of support, more families are also taking on caregiving responsibilities.

Fathers and male caregivers are a vital part of this work. They often support both their child and their partner while also balancing work, family life and other responsibilities. At the same time, many fathers report feeling isolated or left out of services, supports and conversations about their child’s care.

This article highlights resources, services and strategies that can help fathers and male caregivers stay connected, informed and supported.

Connecting with Other Male Caregivers

Connection is important, especially for fathers and male caregivers raising children with disabilities or special health care needs. Talking with other fathers can reduce isolation, provide emotional support and help families build stronger support networks.

Connecting with other male caregivers can also help fathers share information, learn about resources, build advocacy skills and hear from others with similar lived experience.

In Washington state, there are several ways for male caregivers to connect with others.

Washington State Fathers Network

The Washington State Fathers Network helps fathers and male caregivers connect with each other and with helpful resources. The network supports fathers as they share their stories, advocate for change and build inclusion in their communities.

The Washington State Fathers Network supports male caregivers by:

• Developing and promoting local chapters.
• Sharing resources and support.
• Building partnerships across the state.
• Creating resources for fathers and their families.
• Building connection and inclusion.
• Supporting advocacy for male caregivers.
• Hosting events and activities that bring fathers together.

Washington Fatherhood Council

The Washington Fatherhood Council is a collaborative group focused on increasing fatherhood access and belonging. The council works to improve state services, connect dads to resources and make sure fathers with lived experience are included in the work.

The council includes fathers, organizations, academics and advocates. Together, they work to raise awareness about the important role fathers play and to support a father-inclusive culture in communities, agencies and policies.

The council’s work includes:

• Increasing awareness of the essential role fathers play in child and family well-being.
• Promoting father-friendly policies and practices.
• Promoting fair access to resources for fathers and families.

Washington Parent to Parent

Washington State Parent to Parent is a statewide network of local county programs that provide support to families of children with disabilities or special health care needs.

Parent to Parent offers:

• Free and confidential services.
• One-to-one matches with experienced parents called Helping Parents.
• Follow-up support from local county coordinators.
• Help with systems navigation and finding resources.
• Culturally relevant services.
• Support and social groups for families.
• Information and educational trainings.
• Leadership training for parents who want to become volunteer Helping Parents.
• Newsletters, Facebook groups and email groups.

Understanding Services and Supports

Fathers are involved in every stage of their child’s life. They support their children’s development, help with medical care, and often help families navigate services and systems.

However, some fathers raising children with disabilities or special health care needs report feeling excluded by health care providers or service systems. One way to reduce this barrier is to make information about resources easier to find and understand.

Here are some places to start.

• ‍Developmental Disabilities Administration - The Developmental Disabilities Administration, or DDA, provides information about eligibility, case management, service coordination and supports for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities.‍
• DDA Home and Community-Based Services Waivers - DDA waivers may help eligible people access services such as respite, community inclusion, therapies and other supports.‍
• Washington Assistive Technology Act Program - The Washington Assistive Technology Act Program, also called WATAP, helps people with disabilities and people who are aging learn about and use assistive technology. Assistive technology can include tools, equipment or devices that help a person do everyday activities more independently.‍
• Informing Families - Informing Families provides trusted news and information for individuals and families. The goal is to help people be active participants in planning, building support and creating opportunities.‍
• PAVE - PAVE provides support, training, information and resources for individuals, youth and families impacted by disabilities in Washington state.‍
• The Arc of Washington State - The Arc of Washington State supports people with intellectual and developmental disabilities of all ages and their families through services, programs, advocacy and information.

These services are part of a larger system that helps families access care, supports and long-term planning tools.

Respite and Caregiver Support

Caregiving can be rewarding, but it can also be overwhelming. Fathers may be balancing caregiving, work, family relationships and other responsibilities. Respite and caregiver support can help reduce burnout and support family well-being.

• ‍DSHS Family Caregiver Support Program - The Family Caregiver Support Program can help caregivers find local resources and services, connect with caregiver support groups and counseling, get training on caregiving topics, access respite care when they need a break, and talk through specific caregiving challenges.

• ‍DCYF Kinship Care - Kinship care is the full-time care of a child by extended family or suitable others. Suitable others may include close family friends or chosen family. In Washington, grandparents often provide kinship care, but kinship caregivers can also include adult siblings, aunts, uncles, neighbors and others. Federally recognized Tribes determine who is considered a relative for children or youth who are enrolled members or eligible for membership.‍
• Lifespan Respite Washington - Lifespan Respite Washington is administered by PAVE. The program offers mini-grants to unpaid caregivers who support a family member or friend with special needs and do not receive respite from another program.

Other Resources

Visit the Informing Families Resources Library for many more helpful resources for you and your family.

Supporting Your Child’s Development

Fathers and male caregivers support their children through every stage of life. They help children build skills, develop independence, feel emotionally secure and learn through strong relationships. Their involvement can also support communication, emotional regulation and developmental growth. As children move from early childhood to school, transition-age services, adulthood and beyond, families may need different kinds of information and support. The resources below can help families understand education supports, life-stage planning, school-to-work options and other tools that support a child’s development over time.

Families may find the following resources helpful.

Informing Families Life Course Resources

Informing Families offers resources by life stage, including:

• Ages 0-3
• Ages 3-6
• Ages 6-14
• Ages 14-21
• Ages 21-40
• Age 40 and older

These resources can help families think about supports, planning and opportunities across the lifespan.

Mental Health and Well-Being

Male caregivers may experience anxiety, stress, isolation and burnout as they balance caregiving with work, family life and other responsibilities. It can also be hard to find support that feels welcoming and designed with fathers and male caregivers in mind. Taking care of your own mental health is an important part of supporting your child and family. The resources below can help parents and caregivers find connection, crisis support, counseling and someone to talk to when things feel overwhelming.

• NAMI Washington Support Groups
  NAMI offers mental health support, education and resources for individuals and families. Local chapters in Washington may offer support groups and other community-based help.
• Perinatal Support Washington
  Perinatal Support Washington offers resources for parents and providers, including a warm line for parents. New dads can ask to talk with another dad about their own mental health needs or how to support a partner experiencing a mood or anxiety disorder.
• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
  If you or someone in your family is overwhelmed or in crisis, call or text 988, or chat online at 988lifeline.org. This free and confidential support is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
• Psychology Today Therapist Directory
  Psychology Today offers an online directory where families can search for therapists in Washington state. This can be a helpful place to start when looking for counseling or mental health support.

You Are Not Alone

As a father or male caregiver, you are not alone. There are places where you and your experiences can be seen, heard and validated.

Learning about services and supports can help you advocate for your child and family. Connecting with other fathers can help reduce isolation and build support. Taking care of yourself also helps you care for the people you love.

It is OK to ask for help. There are people and organizations that can support you.

Most importantly, your involvement in your child’s life matters. Engaged fathers and male caregivers make a difference.

To connect with other male caregivers raising children with disabilities or special health care needs, consider joining a Washington State Fathers Network chapter meeting. Chapters are located throughout the state and provide a space for male-identifying caregivers to share experiences, resources, support and mentorship in a safe and confidential setting.

This article was created in collaboration with the Washington State Fathers Network.